Draft:Jean Marie Ploque

• Comment: ...and the sources are apparently fictitious. Anybody want to bet this isn't a hoax? bonadea contributions talk 15:27, 24 January 2025 (UTC)

• Comment: Mostly unsourced KylieTastic (talk) 15:24, 24 January 2025 (UTC)

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Jean Marie Ploque
Born	(1765-07-17)July 17, 1765
Died	January 4, 1824(1824-01-04) (aged 58)
Nationality	French
Occupation(s)	Occasional Inventor, Amateur Philosopher, Notorious Eccentric

Jean Marie Ploque (1765–1824) was a French historical figure infamous for her unabashed hedonism, erratic behavior, and a series of catastrophic blunders that have cemented her name in history as a cautionary tale of excess and folly. Despite her limited achievements, Ploque's peculiar life has intrigued historians, sociologists, and humorists alike.

Early Life

Jean Marie Ploque was born in a small village near Rouen, France, to a modest family of farmers. From an early age, Ploque displayed a penchant for mischief, often eschewing traditional schooling in favor of "creative experiments" that frequently ended in chaos. A local legend recounts how an 8-year-old Ploque accidentally set fire to her village’s only grain silo while attempting to “invent” a self-lighting torch by strapping flint to a rooster.

Her parents’ attempts to discipline her proved futile, and she was eventually sent to live with an uncle in Paris. There, she became entranced by the city’s burgeoning intellectual and artistic scene but found little success integrating into its rigorous academic circles due to her erratic behavior.

Descent into Addiction and Infamy

As a young woman, Ploque developed a reputation for indulgence, frequenting Parisian opium dens and experimenting with various narcotics, including laudanum and "Poudre de Rêve," a mysterious concoction rumored to have hallucinogenic properties. Her increasingly erratic behavior earned her the nickname La Poète Folle (The Mad Poet) among her contemporaries, despite having published no poetry of note.

Notable Blunders

Ploque’s life is marked by a series of spectacularly misguided endeavors, including:

The Balloon Incident of 1792: Ploque attempted to prove that humans could fly using "the power of will alone." She constructed a makeshift hot air balloon filled with opium smoke, which briefly ascended before plummeting into the Seine. Ploque survived but was fined heavily for endangering public safety.

The "Invisible" Bridge Project (1795)

[edit] Convinced that she could make bridges "invisible to enemies," Ploque painted a local footbridge in a mixture of mud and goat fat, claiming it would blend seamlessly with the environment. The bridge became dangerously slippery, resulting in several accidents before it was dismantled.

Attempt to "Tame the Wind" (1801)

[edit] Ploque declared her intention to "capture wind" in jars and sell it as an energy source. The project ended when the jars exploded during a public demonstration, showering the audience with shards of glass.

Later Years and Legacy

By the early 1800s, Ploque’s antics had alienated even her most loyal friends and patrons. She spent her final years wandering the countryside, giving incoherent lectures on philosophy and offering dubious "remedies" to passersby. In 1824, Ploque met her untimely end during an ill-conceived experiment involving a modified wine press. Claiming she could "compress inspiration" into a physical form, she inadvertently triggered the press while inside it, resulting in her being catapulted into a nearby haystack. Though the haystack softened the blow, she succumbed to a fatal combination of injuries and embarrassment.

Despite her lack of meaningful contributions, Jean Marie Ploque remains a cultural curiosity. Some historians argue that her outlandish exploits provide a satirical lens through which to view the excesses of the late Enlightenment period. Her life has inspired plays, novels, and even a satirical opera, Le Grand Ploque, which premiered in 1892.

Cultural Depictions

Literature: Ploque appears as a comic figure in numerous 19th-century French novels, most notably in Gustave Lemieux's Les Désastreux (1843).

Art: A caricature of Ploque by artist Jacques Duval is housed in the Musée d'Orsay, capturing her mid-flight during the Great Balloon Incident.

Film: In 1972, French director Alain Renard released Ploque: La Femme qui Rêvait Trop, a black comedy exploring her life.

Quotes Attributed to Ploque

• "True genius lies not in success, but in the magnificent failure of trying."
• "The mind is a hot air balloon, and opium is the flame that lifts it."
• "If one cannot tame the wind, perhaps it is the wind that tames us."