Talk:Tilaluha/GA1
Appearance
GA Review
[edit]GA toolbox |
---|
Reviewing |
Article (edit | visual edit | history) · Article talk (edit | history) · Watch
Nominator: Relayed (talk · contribs) 12:03, 20 December 2024 (UTC)
Reviewer: K. Peake (talk · contribs) 13:38, 8 February 2025 (UTC)
- It is reasonably well written.
- It is factually accurate and verifiable.
- a. (reference section):
- b. (citations to reliable sources):
- c. (OR):
- d. (copyvio and plagiarism):
- a. (reference section):
- It is broad in its coverage.
- a. (major aspects):
- b. (focused):
- a. (major aspects):
- It follows the neutral point of view policy.
- Fair representation without bias:
- Fair representation without bias:
- It is stable.
- No edit wars, etc.:
- No edit wars, etc.:
- It is illustrated by images and other media, where possible and appropriate.
- a. (images are tagged and non-free content have non-free use rationales):
- b. (appropriate use with suitable captions):
- a. (images are tagged and non-free content have non-free use rationales):
- Overall:
- Pass/fail:
- Pass/fail:
(Criteria marked are unassessed)
I will review this article over today! --K. Peake 13:38, 8 February 2025 (UTC)
- Hi! Thanks for taking the review. I will be looking forward to it. – Relayed (t • c) 04:18, 9 February 2025 (UTC)
Infobox and lead
[edit]- Infobox looks good!
- Remove overly obvious wikilink on drums
- Make the release sentence the third one instead
- "and express the want" → "expressing the want"
- I might disagree with this. "with lyrics that reference unrequited love and a breakup and expressing the want to escape from the sorrow the person has gone through" could be "unrequited love, a breakup, and expressing" or as is since express and reference can be both verbs for the lyrics RFNirmala (talk) 10:38, 10 February 2025 (UTC)
"received weak reception" → "received a weak reception"- ""Tilaluha" received mixed responses" → "the song received mixed responses"
"praised the band's vocals and the song's production and lyrical content but" → "praised SB19's vocals, the production, and the lyrical content, but"- Rather than several set lists and events, mention after including what a few of these were named
Background and release
[edit]"also increase in" → "also increasing in"Where is the local-based pop groups being unpopular sourced?- The three hundred auditionees are not sourced
""Tilaluha" was re-released by Sony Music Philippines on February 1, 2020." → "they re-released "Tilaluha" on February 1." to be less repetitive
Composition and lyrics
[edit]"composed by Geong Seong Han[A]" → "composed by Geong[A]"- Shouldn't the musical description sentence be the last of the first para instead as that is quite short and the second one would then be only about lyrics?
- Remove overly obvious wikilink on drums
- Wikilink string section to its own article instead
- [6][3] should either be in numerical order or move [3] to being after the vocal harmonies clause
"is about an" → "are about an"- "and the person's desire to" → "and their desire to" to avoid usage of the person terminology
"akong limutin ka"" → "akong limutin ka."" and place the punctuation inside for the English quote too since this is a full sentence in the source- [20] should only be invoked at the end of the last sentence
Reception
[edit]"describing the song further as "beautiful and underrated" overall." → "finalizing that the song is beautiful and underrated." to be less repetitive and the fact these two words are not used next to each other in the source- Rappler should not be italicised
- "felt like it was written" → "felt like they were written"
"to the band establishing" → "to SB19 establishing" since this is a new para- The contrast to "Tilahula" is not mentioned by the sources and [24] only calls Get In The Zone dance-pop
Wikilink dance-pop to itself instead- "which made them achieve" → "making SB19 achieve"
- Should I also change the marked word for consistency? RFNirmala (talk) 10:42, 10 February 2025 (UTC)
Live performances
[edit]- Img looks good!
To be less repetitive than mentioning 2021 for each concert, I would advise to start this portion of the first sentence as "of several concerts by SB19, including 2021's""the band recorded a performance" → "SB19 recorded a performance"
Credits and personnel
[edit]Use{{spaced ndash}}
so there is the right space between credits and personnel
Release history
[edit]- How do the references back up a release in various territories?
- I have added two more locales of the same URL for the Apple Music citation; as for the Spotify one, I am not entirely sure what I can do to support its release on various territories since Spotify uses a different region-lock mechanic. – Relayed (t • c) 14:09, 12 February 2025 (UTC)
Notes
[edit]- The information before the first clause of Note B is not sourced by [2]
References
[edit]- Copyvio score looks amazing at around 9%!!!
Ref 2's archive is using the same one as ref 20 in errorEither use GMA Integrated News or GMA News for refs 2, 21 and 22 to be consistent as these are all on the same website- I have reverted RFN's edit for this one. I afraid that the sources were published at different times with a different publisher name. Pre-2022, the publisher name was GMA News, thus Lagarde (2021) should have "GMA News" on its parameter. Sometime in October 2022, they changed their identity to "GMA Integrated News", thus sources posted in 2024 was written that way (as per Template:Cite_web#Publisher). – Relayed (t • c) 14:09, 12 February 2025 (UTC)
Cite ABS-CBN News as publisher to ref 9- Maybe it would benefit if you added various countries' citations to ref 16
Cite Rappler as publisher instead on refs 20, 23 and 26
Final comments and verdict
[edit]On hold until all of the issues are fixed; should have been submitted earlier but my browser hit a technical error briefly! --K. Peake 15:10, 9 February 2025 (UTC)
- Hi, Kyle! Thanks for reviewing the article. Still remembered you from the Gento (song) review last time. Thank you very much for the comments; I appreciate it a lot. I'll go over them as soon as possible once I find time to do so. Probably the latest I could address these issues is on Thursday because of other IRL obligations. – Relayed (t • c) 17:08, 9 February 2025 (UTC)
- Hi @Kyle Peake and @Relayed! I worked on some of the points such as copy-editing and publisher consistency in references to help the process. Strike them out if they're good, ping me for any concerns. Hope this GA passes as soon ass possible. RFNirmala (talk) 23:10, 9 February 2025 (UTC)
- RFNirmala I have crossed off where you have addressed my points now, please go over the remaining points when you are free! --K. Peake 09:06, 10 February 2025 (UTC)
- @Kyle Peake I'll let nominator do the content and sourcing points. I did another run on this review, you could check :) RFNirmala (talk) 10:45, 10 February 2025 (UTC)
- Hi, Kyle Peake and RFNirmala. I believe I have addressed everything else. For those points I was not able to address directly, I have left my response above. Thank you for your assistance, RFN. Let me know if you have anything else, Kyle. – Relayed (t • c) 14:09, 12 February 2025 (UTC)
- @Kyle Peake I'll let nominator do the content and sourcing points. I did another run on this review, you could check :) RFNirmala (talk) 10:45, 10 February 2025 (UTC)
- RFNirmala I have crossed off where you have addressed my points now, please go over the remaining points when you are free! --K. Peake 09:06, 10 February 2025 (UTC)
- Hi @Kyle Peake and @Relayed! I worked on some of the points such as copy-editing and publisher consistency in references to help the process. Strike them out if they're good, ping me for any concerns. Hope this GA passes as soon ass possible. RFNirmala (talk) 23:10, 9 February 2025 (UTC)
- Relayed ✓ Pass now, I copyedited the one instance where the article should use marking instead of marked for you. --K. Peake 08:20, 13 February 2025 (UTC)
- Thank you, Kyle! – Relayed (t • c) 08:33, 13 February 2025 (UTC)
- Hi, Kyle! Thanks for reviewing the article. Still remembered you from the Gento (song) review last time. Thank you very much for the comments; I appreciate it a lot. I'll go over them as soon as possible once I find time to do so. Probably the latest I could address these issues is on Thursday because of other IRL obligations. – Relayed (t • c) 17:08, 9 February 2025 (UTC)