Talk:Isaac Clarke/GA1

GA review

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Nominator: Boneless Pizza! (talk · contribs) 18:31, 5 June 2025 (UTC)

Reviewer: Jaguar (talk · contribs) 11:53, 21 June 2025 (UTC)

Comments to follow soon. ♦ JAGUAR  11:53, 21 June 2025 (UTC)

Lead

• "developed by EA subsidiary EA Redwood Shores" - you can safely cut this out
• "which is the last known whereabouts of his ex-girlfriend Nicole Brennan who had sent a brief transmission to him." - this sentence is too long for the lead, I would cut this out
• "with the UI of the video games" - link user interface
• "Isaac is fully voiced throughout the Dead Space franchise by" - overlink
• "as depicted in its sequels & its 2023 remake" - why is there an ampersand?
• I feel the lead is somewhat on the lengthy side and would benefit from being shortened somewhat, given the article's body length

Body

• The caption of the first image awkwardly reads: "Glen Schofield created the character of Isaac Clarke"
• "someone who would be terrified of the horrors he encounter on the Ishimura" - wrong tense, he would encounter or he encountered?
• "His relatability is important for the team to manage the tension with the player" - again, I feel the tense is confusing. This section concerns character development, so should it not be in past tense, as the team were recalling the character's design process? Also, remove 'the'
• "and the hallways in many levels would not stream fast enough" - as
• "who was creative director of the series" - awkward, remove
• "A scene where Isaac locks Ellie into a ship which carry her to safety" - wrong
• " and noted that there are gamers who want a deeper story and well written characters for their video game experiences." - redundant, since we know what we are talking about
• "Isaac will now occasionally speak under certain conditions: the character will respond with dialogue when spoken to, as well as in instances where it would be awkward if he had remained completely silent." - again, this doesn't feel encyclopaedic. Which game is this referring to?
• "Fans have thought that the new design of the character looks similar to Adam Sandler." - I don't think this is significant

Reception

• "players learn about him through his signature Plasma Cutter. As it requires concentration and precision for effective use in combat," - full stop breaks flow and reads poorly, also I am unfamiliar with how a 'Plasma Cutter' can make us learn about his character?
• "in contrast to the first game where he is constantly strung along on instructions from other characters" - informal
• "from barely gets out of his trauma and holding onto the smallest sliver of hope" - this is quite poor...
• I think the second paragraph is too long and could safely be split or condensed. Also, where is his reception from Dead Space 3?

There are some issues with the prose, though the article meets the comprehensibility part of the GA criteria. I will leave this on hold until improvements are made, to which I will take another read-through. ♦ JAGUAR  12:15, 21 June 2025 (UTC)

Fixed a majority of the points you brought up. Pinging nominative @Boneless Pizza!: to see if they can get the rest of the points that were suggested addressed. COOPER COOL 23 user page 16:18, 2 July 2025 (UTC)

Thank you for the fixes, CooperCool23. @Boneless Pizza!: have you managed to address the remaining issues? Jaguar (talk) 14:07, 19 July 2025 (UTC)

No response to the remaining issues -- I'm afraid I must close the GAN. Jaguar (talk) 12:49, 2 August 2025 (UTC)