Talk:Demons of the Punjab/GA1

GA Review

The following discussion is closed. Please do not modify it. Subsequent comments should be made on the appropriate discussion page. No further edits should be made to this discussion.

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Nominator: DoctorWhoFan91 (talk · contribs) 07:15, 14 February 2025 (UTC)

Reviewer: TheDoctorWho (talk · contribs) 07:04, 15 February 2025 (UTC)

I'll take this one on, expect comments within two to three days. TheDoctorWho (talk) 07:04, 15 February 2025 (UTC)

Comments

• British science fiction television -> British science fiction television
• "They both and the other companions Graham O'Brien and Ryan Sinclair get caught up in the events preceding the partition of India," -> "Along with the other companions, Graham O'Brien and Ryan Sinclair, they get caught up in the events preceding the partition of India.
• "while the Doctor investigates if aliens are involved in the death of a man killed during their visit." -> "Meanwhile, the Doctor investigates if aliens are involved in the death of a man killed during their visit."
  • Reworded slightly differently
• "when the group see two aliens" -> "when the group sees two aliens"
  • Collective nouns are plural in british english, so it should be see
• "group witnessing the watch" -> "group witnesses the watch"
• "group; remaining behind" -> "group; he remains behind"
• "Manish, he dies" -> "Manish, Prem dies"
  • Reworded differently
• The sixth episode of the series, the episode was broadcast for the first time on 11 November 2018 on BBC One." -> ""Demons of the Pubjab" is the sixth episode of the eleventh series. It was broadcast for the first time on 11 November 2018 on BBC One."
• "of Doctor Who Access All Areas was" -> "of Doctor Who Access All Areas was"
  • Shift the sentence regarding to behind the scenes after the viewership info; that we know "the episode" is referring to that of Doctor Who and not Access All Areas.
• Anything on international broadcasts, both dates and viewership (BBC America/CTV Sci-Fi/ABC TV)?
  • I didn't find anything - I barely found any refs for the British numbers even
• "to the writer and" -> "to Patel and"
• "the same flaws as the season" -> "similar flaws to other episodes of the series"
• "However, she stating that" -> "However, she stated stated that"
• "as well- mixing" -> "as well as mixing"
  • Reworded differently, as the second "as" implies a different thing
• "showing the even" -> "showing that even"

Had some extra time and wanted to get to part of this, it covers everything except the production section and a review of the references. I'll still try to get to the remainder in the next day or two. TheDoctorWho (talk) 05:14, 16 February 2025 (UTC)

Made most of the changes, replied where I didn't, or did it differently. Thanks for taking up the review. DWF91 (talk) 17:32, 16 February 2025 (UTC)

Production section review:

• Not a requirement by any means, but a few things I found that you may want to flesh out a bit more: Music Recording took place at Abbey Road Studios; aired on BBC America on the same day (not a simulcast since it was several hours later); 710,000 viewers on BBCA; couldn't find anything on CTV or ABC.
  • did a very slight expansion- though did not add the BBCA numbers, as the third source seems kind of unreliable, and the former is a tweet
• Perhaps a short expansion on the casting paragraph with the roles they played, this may help
  • done
• The development and writing sections seem to have a lot of run-on sentences - can a few of those be broken up into smaller, easier to digest ones?
  • did some, though the length is kinda necessary- it was basically a long train of thought- I don't think it can be broken into shorter sentences
• South Asia may be a specific enough region to wl here.
  • done

Not much else to say here, nice work - I'll do a source review once this is addressed. TheDoctorWho (talk) 05:10, 18 February 2025 (UTC)

done, TheDoctorWho. DWF91 (talk) 07:48, 18 February 2025 (UTC)

References:

• Assuming good faith on Hearn/DWM
• References look good in terms of consistency, formatting, linking, etc.
• Performed some general cleanup scripts for capitalization, and categories
• Spot checked refs 3, 7, 13, 16, 18, and 21; everything appears to check out

Overall:

GA review (see here for what the criteria are, and here for what they are not)

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Copyvio returns unlikely at 23%, which is mostly from direct and attributed quotes. Per my comments above being addressed I'll be passing this, nice work!

1. It is reasonably well written.

   a (prose, spelling, and grammar): b (MoS for lead, layout, word choice, fiction, and lists):

2. It is factually accurate and verifiable, as shown by a source spot-check.

   a (reference section): b (inline citations to reliable sources): c (OR): d (copyvio and plagiarism):

3. It is broad in its coverage.

   a (major aspects): b (focused):

4. It follows the neutral point of view policy.

   Fair representation without bias:

5. It is stable.

   No edit wars, etc.:

6. It is illustrated by images and other media, where possible and appropriate.

   a (images are tagged and non-free content have non-free use rationales): b (appropriate use with suitable captions):

   I'll still be passing this, but I will say that an image of Mandip Gill may not hurt in the production section given that this is a Yaz-centric episode.

7. Overall:

   Pass/Fail:

   TheDoctorWho (talk) 18:46, 18 February 2025 (UTC)

The discussion above is closed. Please do not modify it. Subsequent comments should be made on the appropriate discussion page. No further edits should be made to this discussion.